P. Bunk always said: There's no comfort in a growth zone, and there's no growth in a comfort zone. Well P. Bunk, here's to you and one of the most influential phrases in my life. I declare 2014, my Year of Growth.
My one of my co-worker uses Match.com, and he tells me and Lindsay about his experiences, which seem relatively normal. Lindsay has also meet lots of normal cool people who have told her they use Match.com. These thoughts definitely went through my head as I made my decision. I also accepted the challenge to start working on one of my new years resolutions. One of my resolutions was "Start dating again. Maybe put some effort into it". I thought of these aforementioned reasons and then was like "NOOOOOOO" because the idea of dating gives me anxiety. After being talked down the ledge and getting support from some friends and hermanita, I decided to join and LDS dating site. Saryah and I were joking about login names, and sadly, it turns out that the login name is permanent. Therefore, my login name is really ridiculous, which, I guess will help sort through guys who don't have a sense of humor, or are strange. Please see below example of a strange one.
As soon as I joined the dating website, I felt like I was going to die. Have I mentioned that the idea of dating gives me anxiety? So far, it hasn't been as terrible as I thought. I just have to stop stressing out. If I act like they are just future friends, my anxiety goes away. It's a little mind trick I'm trying out. So far, it's been effective. There is a quiz you can take on the website, and one of the questions was how do you define yourself. I couldn't choose between Comic Relief or Brains of the Operation. I was leaning towards Comic Relief (I mean, are you even reading this post?) but Erica said I was the brains. Well, if you insist. Currently, I am at about four days on a dating website, and 24 hours on Tinder.
- Uncomfortable Growth Moment 1: January. I became activities co-chair. A social position. I have to talk to people and organize events. It's not bad, but after giving into my introverted anti-social self for the last half of 2013, it's a growth moment for me.
- Uncomfortable Growth Moment 2: February. I've decided I need to meet new people. A social decision. I really just work, go to the gym, and go home every day. I love my routine, but I don't meet new people. I decided I would try online dating. In this technological world, maybe that's the only way to meet new people.
My one of my co-worker uses Match.com, and he tells me and Lindsay about his experiences, which seem relatively normal. Lindsay has also meet lots of normal cool people who have told her they use Match.com. These thoughts definitely went through my head as I made my decision. I also accepted the challenge to start working on one of my new years resolutions. One of my resolutions was "Start dating again. Maybe put some effort into it". I thought of these aforementioned reasons and then was like "NOOOOOOO" because the idea of dating gives me anxiety. After being talked down the ledge and getting support from some friends and hermanita, I decided to join and LDS dating site. Saryah and I were joking about login names, and sadly, it turns out that the login name is permanent. Therefore, my login name is really ridiculous, which, I guess will help sort through guys who don't have a sense of humor, or are strange. Please see below example of a strange one.
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| This is my Tinder thing. I'm forever in love with this pic and happy Marijn took it. |
Tinder. That's right. Lindsay explained this to me a few months ago, but I'm surprised at how many people don't know what it is. A brief explanation: it is the most superficial way to meet people in the world. A picture of a person pops up, and you swipe left if you are not interested or swipe right if you are interested. If you are both interested, you get a match and have the opportunity to chat. If not, it's anonymous, so they'll never know, and you never see their picture again. It's connected to your phone's GPS, so everyone it pulls up is in your area. I've had 7 matches so far, and chatted with one of them. The fun part, is you can say "dang, I'm chatting with this really hot guy" because you already decided he was, and you already know they find you attractive.
No-No's I have learned during my 24 hours on Tinder.
- No shirtless pictures. Guys, you get to choose what photos are shown. When you're shirtless, it says you love yourself too much, and you're an idiot.
- No pictures of you and a small child, I assume that child is yours. I'm not ready for that.
- Post a duck-face selfie, and I'm saying no.
- No pictures where you look super trashed
- No pictures where alcohol is displayed
- If your smile looks creepy, don't post the picture. Once again, you get to choose the photo. Why you creepin'?
When I got my first Tinder match, I almost died with nerves. Luckily, just because you match, doesn't mean you have to talk to them. #win. For now, it is just a highly addictive game with little to no consequence in my life. I'm more than okay with that. I'm getting used to meeting new people again, and it's starting to be fun. My friend who convinced me to do Tinder, has said to use it as practice talking to people. Work bestie Charles says I can practice trying not to be awkward as much as I want, but it probably won't change much. :D All I know, is I'm so far out of my comfort zone, that's I am definitely learning things and growing.
